Slugs and snails and puppy dog's tails.....
Slugs. Ugh. What on earth was God thinking when he created these disgusting, stomach-churning creatures? They are just the most putrid living things on the face of this earth.
And we have a population boom this year - all thanks to our quintessential English summer (yes, I am being sarcastic).
So, Joshua being a boy and being at the age where boys are generally disgusting I gave him the job of annihilating them. He chose the salt pot.
And with glee, he trotted around the garden looking for his squishy victims and even turned them over, 'to see the foot bubble up and swell'.
It got too gross at this point so I went inside the kitchen.
The last thing I heard through the kitchen window was the neighbour, Phillip, telling him, 'Stand back, Josh, I think it's gonna blow'.