Before I go ahead with this post I am putting forth my disclaimer that this is meant in a totally lighthearted fashion and is in no way an opening round of mysognists verses misandrists. If you are sensitive about the roles of men and women, log off. If you like a laugh about your own gender and that of the loveable opposite, read on.
It's a long established fact that women do certain things and men do certain things. Sometimes it's nature doing it's wonderful job and other times it's each other expecting the other to do what nature intended to be the other's job.
You with me?
From my point of view I believe that in a co-habiting household (so don't shoot at me if you're on your own holding down a home and bringing up children - to me you are worthy of an Olympic gold), women are quite OK to do the following jobs without compromising their position of equality on the planet (a notion I actually think is complete rubbish as I am a bit of a traditionist and think women are women and should act so and men are men, and equally act so).
Women and what we're better at:
Dusting and ironing (simply because men take too long and are no good at it).
Food shopping (because men put extras in the trolley and quadruple the original food bill, women budget better. Shoes and lipsticks are exempt from the budget).
Buy presents and cards for family and friends (because men simply don't remember those things and it's no point us trying to nag them, it's an X dominated chromosome thing).
Interior decorating (men are functional when it comes to decor and women are homely).
Men and what they're better at:
Mowing the lawn (because mowers are heavy and awkward to handle and because men are stronger, they're better at it. Plus there's something quite sexy about a man's muscley toned forearm pushing a mower.)
Putting out the bins (because bins smell - nuff said).
Fixing the car (as a woman I consider even checking out the oil pokey thing a tad too messy so greasing up with barrier cream before diving into an oily dirty engine - no way!)
Making a cup of tea in the morning (I've only added this because Andy has, without fail for the whole of our 11 year marriage, with the exception of the odd Christmas, his birthday and few Sunday mornings - made me a cup of tea in the morning.)
Driving (I know some women will hate me for this, but I speak purely for myself - I'm dire at it. I have zero sense of direction and I admit to even phoning Andy from the NEC to ask if I really should be heading towards the M6 or would the M42 be a better option? And yes, I really did drive around the roundabout three times reading the signs out to him just to make sure.)
Now, while I've been posting this, my children have got in on the act too and these little gems are purely their own words.
Maddie's contribution: Men can only cook bread - women can cook anything.
Joshua's contribution: Women can't resist changing the furniture around every two months.
Make of it all what you will people If I've missed anything off that you feel worthy of a mention, put your case forward.